I thought my love was enough… to love you, to defend you, to wait for you…But now I realized that it isn’t anymore… and it’s not enough for me to even love me… that’s why I’ve found myself someone who can love me enough… and he is.
Please, forget me and forgive me
If forgetting and forgiving are always that easy to do
Not even a second his gaze wavered away from the sight of the love of his life walking through the aisle…
Not even a second he let him away from his gaze… and if it was up to him, it would never be… Not after an eternity without feeling his presence by his side, listening his laughter by his ear, enjoying his warmth beside his body.
And he could barely contain his tears when Junsu finally took his place beside him and smiled the smile he had been missing so much…
“Finally… “ he whispered, trying not to choke on his words. “After 18 years of waiting…” Ignoring the frown marring the pastor’s face, he raised his hand to touch Junsu’s cheek, to caress it tenderly. “You are finally standing here beside me...”
Junsu smiled wavered slightly as he fought the tears which were insisting to trail down his own cheek and grasped Yoochun’s hand with equally gentleness. “No more waiting, Chunnie-yah… I’m here and I’m finally yours…”
“Forever… well, although our forever might be shorter than the normal,” He still somehow could crack a joke despite in the brink of tears. “I’m not young anymore… and neither are you,” His watery grin widened.
Yoochun leaned his head forward and touched Junsu’s forehead with his. “It’s okay,” He whispered. “We’re going to live until hundred anyway… and that means I will still have at least 55 years with you… and the rest of eternity…”
‘After nearly losing him for the second time…’
“shit shit shit… Park Yoochun… Now you’ve finally done it! He’s going to hate you and disappear from you again… forever this time!” Yoochun cursed himself for being such a fool and followed an 18 years old suggestion to finally ask Junsu to take their relationship further.
Well, it showed him that kids would always be kids… And now… he would lose Junsu forever…
And not even the phone call from Jung Junior could calm his down. Not after seeing the horrified expression on Junsu’s face when he confessed to him. He really had ruined everything this time.
He didn’t know how to handle such feeling for the second time. If the first time it sent him being crazily delusional and burying himself into his work, the second time might really send him into the mental health institution…
A knock on the door.
He was really not in the mood of meeting anyone. Much less some teenager brats who acted like they knew how to handle his love life.
Well, great they’ve turned his non-existent one into a disaster instead.
So he yelled. “Fuck off! I’m not seeing anyone!”
But the pounding didn’t stop… not even 5 minutes later.
He cursed Junsu for passing the stubborn genes into his offsprings. Hell, most probably Jung Yunho also contributed the stubbornness, making those spawns as hard headed as this.
He didn’t have any choice but to throw them away physically then.
“Shit, I’ve told you...
Junsu was on his door, looking as beautiful and perfect as always…
“Can I come in?”
Dumbfounded, Yoochun shifted his body to make a way for Junsu to enter his condominium.
Silence filled the room. Yoochun simply couldn’t rack his brain to find anything to say while the slightly younger man seemed to be content to play with the hems of his shirt.
“Y, Yoochun-ah…” after several minutes of tense quietness, Junsu somehow found his guts to open his mouth.
“I’m sorry… I really am Junsu… I f you want you can forget everything that I said before… We can just be friends.. or acquaintancse if you hate me that much. But pleasepleasedon’t leavemeaga…”
“Yoochun, I want to… I mean I agree… I… I don’t mind that we’re taking our… rela…relationship more… seriously?”
That shut Yoochun up. And he froze… replaying the sentence a few more times in his head. And again and again and…
He ran to Junsu and practically grabbed his shoulders and shook him in disbelief… eyes begging Junsu to please don’t wake him if this was a mere dream… to please don’t ruin his imagination…
“Yoochun-ah… I’m serious… I want to be your…”
Junsu didn’t know what would he be if they took their relationship into a more serious step… Boyfriends? They were both 42 years old! Boyfriends only made what they had sound so trivial.
But Yoochun didn’t care. As long as he got Junsu now… and he would never let him go. Never, ever.
And he said it too.
“You are mine now, okay? You can’t back out… you can never take it back, understand? I’m not going to let you go again, not anymore… do you hear that? Never…”
Junsu just kissed him to stop the rambling.
And to show that he wouldn’t mind to be Yoochun’s forever this time.
End of flashback
Before Junsu could reply with an equally mushy statement, the old pastor coughed slightly to remind them where they were, and started the ceremony.
“… Park Yoochun, please say your vow…”
And that was the moment Yoochun had been waiting for in his 45 years of his life. Taking Junsu’s hand in his own, he gazed straight to the pair of eyes that belonged to the person he had loved, loves and will love the most in the whole world and his hand slowly pulled out a crinkled letter from his white wedding suit pocket.
With shaking fingers, he opened the paper and after a quick glance to it, his eyes returned back to the pair of almond eyes that was always haunting his days and night since the first time they met.
There was no need for the letter. He had it all inside his head… in fact his heart had been bursting to just announced it to the whole world…
A quiver in his voice but he knew that he couldn’t stop. It was a long overdue reply for the piece of paper that had changed his, their lifes forever…
“I'm writing this to let you know… that I will never let you go. Not anymore. We’ve been through so much. You’ve praised me, defended me, carried me, inhabited me and adored me. You’ve fought to keep me free. You’ve lied to keep me pretty. You defended my choices. And when I betrayed you, you looked away. You once thought that your love was not enough… to love me and to even love you anymore. But here and now, I promise you that my love will always be enough… to love you and to love both of us. I’ve been a fool to let you go once… And now here I stand, 18 years older, vowing that I will never take you for granted again… will never let you go again… It is a waiting of an eternity…”
He stepped forward and knelt down, still grasping Junsu’s fingers tightly and entwined them with his own.
“So, Kim Junsu, will you agree to be my lawfully wedded husband?”
And 18 years later, Park Yoochun finally able to hear the two words he had dreamed so much before.
From Junsu, with tears in his eyes and the smile on his lips…
A/N again sorry for the rushed ending^^ I'll really try to make it up to you maybe through some sequel and if I really really have no other ideas for this fic, I promise to make the next one more detailed and thorough^^... so yeah, posting this today since my flight is in several more hours and I won't be able to write during my trip since my dad will be hovering around... and yeah, I couldn't possibly write slash fic when he's around. hahaha. he'll chop me for sure!
anyway, hope that you enjoy this! the pdf file will be after I'm back from my trip I guess^^. Thanks for all of my loyal readers who never fail to comment on this story although it is quite short and fast paced with loads of fast forward^^. This story, of course, is dedicated to my baby, purpleinpink for her wonderful plunny. Hope that I did justice to your plunny bb! (although maybe it didn't turn like what you expected hehehe)
so, so, so, see you on the next story... which will be hopefully soon? hehehe